Make it stop!

A nagging lower back pain has been plaguing me for the past couple weeks. It’s now gotten to the point where I don’t want to do any activity out of fear of aggravating the pain… and to the point where I just want to eat all the things because it’s driving me crazy.

Yes, that’s a Twix bar wrapper right there. In my defense, my vending machine that I was counting on for a caffeine fix was out of order at work so I got this as a sugar substitute. I’m still tired. Go figure…

I know I shouldn’t emotionally eat, especially after the photos that emerged from last weekend.

Vegas was my stop. Buffets were already paid for. Damage. I came home with an extra pound-and-a-half on my person. Not bad, but since I danced so much it’s still a little disappointing.

Here’s my trick for buffets: stock up on veggies and fruits first while grabbing SMALL portions of things that look good to try. This way I fill up on good things for me and I eat less of the junk. Seriously, try that the next time your at a buffet. It really saved me during this trip.

Digressing now. My happy weight is still below what I am currently… and now I have the photo that could scare me into hitting the healthy circuit really hard.

Suffice it to say that me no likey the love handles. And me no likey my pants feeling snug. Both have got to go. I don’t want this to be all about vanity, but at this point, it kind of is. I don’t compare myself to others–I do know how trim my body has been in the past and I want that back.

Now if only my lower back wasn’t being such a pain in me booty then this would be a lot easier to get a handle on and get’r done!

Any one have pointers for lower back pain (not muscle, but the actual spine)?


Running on Low

My ideas on what to write about are on a low.  NaNoWriMo is stealing all my creative juices… and I’m even behind in that!

The only thing I can think about is the fact that my appetite over the past week has been minimal.  I have no idea why this has been the case.  Maybe I’m eating more satisfying foods or something, but it doesn’t feel like I’m even doing that.  Note the Skittles and PB M&M’s I ate following an intense discussion with My Man.  But I even spread those out over a couple days!

While in Vegas and California, I thought I would be tempted at every corner.  Nope, that didn’t happen so much.  In fact, there was probably one meal a day that I didn’t finish.  I wanted to try a burrito place by USC that I’d heard was good.  Got their smallest burrito and I could barely make it 3/4 of the way through it.

Now that I’ve stopped to think about it… I’ve had a substantial breakfast every day for the past week or so.  Maybe that is having something to do with my lack of appetite.  They haven’t been the most healthy breakfasts either. Cap’n Crunch Oops! All Berries are back in stores… I started my second box this morning–favorite!  But you know how they always say that breakfast is key to weight loss and also to curb cravings later in the day… perhaps that’s been my trick over the past little bit.

So remember folks… breakfast can make a difference! It gives your body a jump-start for the day and can help you eat less later on.  This reminds me of a saying I heard a while back:

Eat breakfast like a king, lunch like a prince and dinner like a pauper.

Does it hold any truth?  No idea… not a bad thing to consider though.

REMEMBER TO TRACK! It seriously helps.

Happy Monday everyone!

PS:  Wendie Plan is pretty awesome… down 3 pounds in 2 weeks.  Woot woot!

Enjoy it all… then track it!

So it’s been a crazy few days. Birthday was wonderful and relaxing with mani-pedis with my mom followed by a scrumptious birthday sushi dinner where I found a new favorite roll (Red Dragon… mmmmm!). And thank you all who sent me birthday wishes!

My birthday kind of extended into Friday when I got to see my man during my 3-hour layover in LA on my way to Sac Town. He’s so stinking sweet to me… But I have a feeling he wants to make me fat. Haha! Just kidding, but you may see why I said that in a moment. He picked me up, took me to breakfast and gave me a list of things for my birthday even though I was completely thrilled just to see him. He gave me a darling/funny card, two stunning and aromatic red roses, a bag of gummy bears (spaced out over two days) plus a huge slice of chocolate cake (which I couldn’t finish because the icing was too rich–but it was still delicious)…

Let me tell you, I was surely a sight trying to keep a grip on all of this along with my purse as I went through the airport security. Many people commented. Haha! I even found out later that a man I shared that next flight with saw me taking a picture of it–and he was a part of the wedding that I was on my way to as well! Kind of embarrassing but kind of funny too. Nice guy.

Then there were the wedding festivities… The night before, a big group of us went to this delightful Italian restaurant where the balsamic had me drooling over it the whole night. Seriously, it was like candy. I may have had a whole weeks’ worth of the daily oil requirement in just that evening. Delish! And then the food at the actual wedding was amazing too. The pork I had was perfectly cooked and moist–I could eat it every day if I could! And the wedding cake wasn’t bad either.

So yes, a lot of eating. However, I think I balanced it out well with activity. The bride and her bridesmaids wanted me to teach a pre-wedding Zumba session like I did at my step-brothers wedding over the summer. Imagine Zumba done in a humid hotel pool room. Talk about sweating buckets! On top of that, the band at the wedding was excellent so there was a lot of dancing to be done. I probably danced about 4 hours minimum that night… in heels even! So much fun!

Thing is, I never once tracked since Friday. My phone was being uber-glitchy so I didn’t want to put up with it (I think it knew it was about to be replaced with the new iPhone so it wanted to p!ss me off). But as soon as I got home, I tracked every single bit of the weekend. I went over my weeklies, but I still tracked it. I enjoyed every little bit of this weekend like I should and kept myself accountable. The scale was barely up when I weighed in yesterday so I think I hit a fairly good balance.

That’s really the key to all this though… Enjoyment, not deprivation–then track it! It’s all part of the plan! As long as you follow the plan, it’s not “cheating”. Everyone can make this work!

Hope you all had a lovely weekend! Much love!

The “C” Word

What do you think of when you see the word “cheat“?

Negative connotations, right?

I don’t know about you but I really despise this word. A lot of people use it in the “dieting” world and it’s rather tiresome.

  • “I totally cheated last night at Olive Garden and ate way too much.”
  • “My friend made me cheat by making me eat half of her chocolate bar.”
  • “If I eat it after 10 PM, it’s not cheating.”

The reason why I hate it? Take a look at the Merriam-Webster definition (with minimal condensing from me) and see if you can figure it out.

  1. to break a rule or law usually to gain an advantage at something
  2. to take something from (someone) by lying or breaking a rule; to prevent (someone) from having something that he or she deserves or was expecting to get
  3. to avoid (something bad, dangerous, etc.) by being clever or lucky

Any guesses yet?

Cheating, to me, is an active, fully conscious act to gain something that may or may not be yours by means trickery and dishonesty–i.e. a conscious deception.

“Cheat” is not listed in my lifestyle dictionary. Everything that I do, what I eat and how often I exercise, is a choice that I make. Another a choice I make is to be honest–a trait that so-called cheating lacks.

This is where tracking what you eat and what kind of activity you participate in prevents “cheating” on a diet/lifestyle. An honest record of these things or even owning up to your choices cancels out any deception–so the “c” word doesn’t apply!

Somethings may not be as healthy but that’s just how it goes! So I like to eat brownie batter… who cares? I haven’t broken a rule or law, I haven’t prevented either myself or someone else to get what is expected, and I’m certainly not avoiding anything. This makes me feel that the word “cheat” is being used improperly.  I’m honest about it just as I should be; my stomach can feel it and the residual taste is still on my tongue. I know that I’ve done it. I make the choice to eat the batter and hold myself accountable for it.

Do you know what another choice of mine is? To live a life where I choose to progress in my health endeavors and not be deprived. I eat the batter–I combat it with a healthier choice next time or an extra ten minutes of dancing around my room naked. It’s not a step back so much as it is an opportunity to enjoy myself a little more for a moment. Things taste good–why not enjoy them?

This is why WeightWatchers trumps most other weight loss options. It encourages healthy choices but still allows you to enjoy the foods you love in moderation. No deprivation necessary. Not only that, but it encourages honesty and accountability with what goes into your body. The “c” word doesn’t apply if it’s part of the plan. ;)

So instead of “cheating” on a diet or lifestyle, simply own up to the fact that a decision is a decision. If you enjoy it, why should you consider it cheating anyway? A lifestyle is forever. If part of your lifestyle is enjoying a cookie every once in a while, there is nothing wrong with that. Just remember that you will always have control over your life even if you think you don’t at times.

Keep in mind this is just my opinion… I hope I’ve given you something to think about.

What’s your opinion on the “c” word?

A Wedding of a Weekend

I’m so exhausted from this weekend I could just collapse right now… 10+ hours on plane rides across the country over one weekend is pretty taxing.

Plan-wise, Friday was great. I was able to bend everything to limited white starches and stuff like that but have everything I wanted at the same time (like the key lime pie dessert at the rehearsal dinner–so delicious!). As far as working out goes, I managed to squeeze in a little strength training in the terminal since I was freezing and it was the only way to warm up since I had no blankets. Then clubbing that night allowed me to dance my heart out for a bit! Tracking was good too! So triple check!

The wedding day (Saturday) started even better even if it didn’t end that way… Only two check marks for the day. Woke up bright and early to go do an interval walk/run workout in the hotel’s fitness facility. I broke an amazing sweat before popping over to breakfast with the bride where oatmeal and a hard-boiled egg were my saviors. After that, it was time for all the bridesmaids to gather to get ready in a mass of hairspray and bobby pins. Let me just say that I haven’t felt so chic in my life! The side bun I had in my hair seemed only fitting for the runway… but it was pretty. The problem with getting ready and such led me to not eating much during the day. I will get to why it was a problem in just a little bit.

The wedding… was absolutely stunning! It almost didn’t happen since it was pouring buckets at our hotel and my bestie said there was no way she was going to be married inside a room. It was only windy at the beach but still worrisome. But seriously, right as she walked out from getting bride-ready–the sun came out! So the ceremony was wonderful. It was exactly how I had ever imagined a beach wedding would be. The bride was absolutely breathtaking and the groom recited vows that I wish someone will say about me one day. I was trying so hard not to cry but he broke me…

After the wedding, we all curtailed our tushes inside for cocktail hour… which is where the no food became a problem apparently. I wanted at least one good drink so I told the bar tender to make me the best thing he had (that didn’t contain tequila, that is) and it was one of the most delicious drinks I’ve ever had. The problem? It had about 5 different kinds of alcohol in it so I was buzzed after the first drink. Then my gay buddy wanted me to get another since he tried mine and said he wanted to drink one with me. Yep. A very bad idea on an empty stomach but I was oh-so compliant because it was oh-so yummy (and I was oh-so-prematurely buzzed).

As soon as dinner started, I downed pasta, a salad, wheat rolls, half of my chicken and a slice of chocolate wedding cake. When I reflect back on it, I actually didn’t eat that much because I didn’t finish anything except for the pasta and salad. It balanced since I hadn’t eaten much that day anyway. But then there was champagne for the toasts. Oh yeah, I forgot that there was a Pinot Noir as well. In my defense, I only drank that because no one was refilling water and I couldn’t find a pitcher to refill it myself so it was my only option–I was parched!

Let’s just say my head was spinning quite fast as we went into the after-party dance. My best friend was pleased when I told her that I did get drunk even if it wasn’t completely intentional (“That means the party was good then!” was what she said.) Had a good time with friends, puked a little, then passed out as soon as I got back to the hotel.

My roomie and I went on a 30 minute walk yesterday morning to scout out the area for breakfast, where I only ate a fraction of it because my stomach wasn’t feeling so hot which wasn’t helped by the flights soon after. Once I had some grease from Wendy’s and pepto in my system I felt much better.

All that and I’m down. Success! Makes me glad that I had a great week leading up to the wedding. Now I’m back and ready to go again! Must get to bed early tonight though…

Hide Them Away!

The main person who loves Reese’s peanut butter cups (aside from myself) is my step dad. Oh, and he did it again! He bought another bag! And where does he leave it? Right on the counter. In my vision. Where all I can think about whenever I go downstairs is, “Should I have one? No… ok, maybe just one.”

So I finally said, I’ve had enough! I shoved the bag into one of our cabinets so it’s out of sight and out of mind. My step dad actually approved because I hid them from my brother in the process (who pigs out on anything). Surprisingly, it’s a win-win situation that I wasn’t expecting. It’s not constantly tempting me from the counter and my step dad can have them for himself.

Out of sight, out of mind. Perfect solution. =)


My body is sore, yes. That would be from the Pole Fitness classes from Tuesday and tonight. I may be lucky if I can walk without wincing tomorrow.

There was another kind of an ouch moment tonight… It’s a bittersweet one.

My mom asked if I was up. Just casually. I told her yes–but that I am in the process of taking back my control. She asked how much I was up. I told her 160 (only 4 pounds off my lifetime range). She said, “Whoa. Yeah, I thought I noticed.” — Um… ouch?

Love the honesty. The part I hate was that four/five pounds is really that noticeable. Now that blows my mind. I mean, I could tell by how certain pants fit but I didn’t think anyone else would really notice since it’s such a small number and I stand at 5’9″. Surely my weight would be evenly distributed and not screaming, “Hey! Look, I’ve gained weight!”

I guess that’s not the case.

What doesn’t help is that during my first week of being back on track, someone in our house brought my ultimate trigger into it. If anything containing any combination of chocolate and peanut butter is within a mile of me, odds are I will sniff it out and devour it so it’s not around (it’s too good to throw away, I’m sorry). And I’ve had my share in the past couple days of them. Tracked, of course. But still… if it’s not in the house, I’m not constantly thinking about it thus not making a beeline for it first thing in the morning and right when I get home.

Fortunately, my mom informed me that she’s for sure coming back to WW this week (like she has said for the past month) and no more of these kinds of temptations will be brought into the house. This better hold true. The next time I find anything resembling a peanut butter cup in this house, all h-e-double-hockey-sticks is going break loose. There will be yelling. There will be tears. If they must be in the house, they must be there without my knowledge and hidden so well that I would never run across them. I consider myself to have decent self-control… except when it comes to treats like this.

This is the one thing I HATE about living at home–it’s an environment that I can only have so much control over. If I could have complete control… that’s the day I’m waiting for.

Ouch! Those Reeses aren’t going to give me the abs I want… No more!
Ouch! But thanks for the honesty, mother.
And Ouch! I hope I’ll be able to walk tomorrow.


It’s amazing how badly a busy schedule could derail my healthy eating… And it’s even more amazing how I haven’t blogged in nearly two weeks. The reason I’m able to now is simple because two of the interns (me included) have been given permission to hang for a while because there’s not enough for all four of us to do. So we are trading off! Did you know that we are hosting the NCAA women’s basketball first and second round championships? Yeah pretty sure it’s insanity but it’s pretty cool.

My job has kept me sooo insanely busy these last couple weeks that I’m starting to question my sanity. My eating habits and tracking have fallen the way side and the scale is up… A lot more than I would like. But oddly enough, I still have definition thanks to keeping up a steady schedule of pole fitness. I start my days relatively well but then come the end of the day, all I want is a good chocolate bar to ease me troubled mind. Or a mocha to help me make it through the day.

Another thing is that I graduate in less than a month and a half. It’s pretty scary! I’ve been on the prowl for summer opportunities in the dead of night. I just want to be done and off doing something great all ready so I can get into a steady flow where it’s easy to track, eat right and not have too much stress in my life. I’ve heard it gets much easier after college once you have found a job. Right?

I still want to eat right and everything but… It’s just incredibly difficult right now and I wish it weren’t so.

I know I said a few weeks ago that I love my body. I still do. But the scale has to go back down to where it was. Would it be wrong to have a fresh start, clear my WW history, and do my darnedest to stay on track? Go back to basics you know… Maybe that is what I need. What do you think?

On an upside, I have a great new way to track my food, activity, and such… My graduation present is able to download an app to do it! And I love it! I’m actually blogging from it right now. It’s just so convenient. ;)

Sweets in the Athletic Department

Unless you just started following me, you probably know that I’m interning in my University’s sports department. It’s amazing. I write all the time and get to meet with athletes and coaches on a weekly basis. Constantly having fun! And… eating? :S

The one thing that I don’t understand though is this: Why is it that the athletic department, of all the departments, brings so many treats for the workers?

You’d think that because of the athletic nature that the treats would be reined in because you’d think they’d care about health. NOPE! Some kind of baked good is in the office 4 out of the 5 days of the week. In addition to that, at each football game, at least two people bring baked goods (often cookies and brownies–weaknesses of mine) for the press box.  They seriously sit not five feet away from where I happen to be stationed making it difficult to refuse said sweets.

One of the girls here is seriously going to kill me though. She’s one of the best home bakers I’ve met; each time she brings something I have to try it because they are so scrum-diddly-umptious! And then I end up wanting more. Often, I’ll tell myself to not even touch them. But then someone sits next to me applauding her baking skills yet again… and I just have to try one! It’s quite the battle. She always makes something different so I’m just waiting for her to bomb on a recipe… is that awful? Haha.

But it absolutely blows my mind that the athletic department is endorsing the eating of such things!

Let me just say that I’m very glad my activity is high enough that I usually don’t have too worry too much. But it’s getting to be a bit much, I think.

Case in point: right now, there are cupcakes and brownies sitting in the lobby. I’ve had two brownies. (In my defense, they were mint and extremely worth the 8 points in my book when they are that good.) They are tracked and I’m officially out of daily points. Small dinner for me tonight!

The bad news that isn’t really related but would affect my week and brownie consumption:
Somehow I dorked my knee badly in Zumba last night. Like really bad. It was like one second, I was fine. The next moment, I was yelping and stumbling. No idea what happened. And I hate it when that happens. (XD) I can’t even walk around campus today because it hurts so much! (“Hello, bus driver! Yes, this is the third time you’ve seen me in one day.”) Because of this, I don’t know if I’ll be able to workout tonight. I’ll try the elliptical for a bit but if even that causes problems, I may be out of commission for the time being. First my hip and now my knee? Talk about depressing. I NEED MY WORKOUT! GAH!

But back to the athletic department… can a get a collective, “HUH?”


Tantalizing treats around every corner. I tried to stay away, I really did. I resorted to going for walks in order to keep myself away from the trailers contents of mini chocolate bars.

Even tracking failed. Abysmally. That’s not entirely my fault as I didn’t have much service camping.

The only thing that was any good was my activity. I hiked to the top of Angels Landing at Zions National Park… a 3.5 hour hike (12 APs)! My hips and legs still hurt! 1500 feet in the air with steep switchbacks and a point where you have to use chains to help hoist yourself up the side of the mountain. It was epic awesomeness and the view was spectacular.

And then yesterday, because my step-dad’s snoring woke me up at 4 a.m. and I couldn’t get back to sleep because he wouldn’t stop, I decided to go for a run in order to get out of that room. Nearly 30 minutes straight of jogging/running with about 20 minutes of walking and stretching at 6 in the morning. I saw the night turn into dawn and it was pure wonderfulness.

If only I could say the same for my eating. There was seriously cookies, candy, cheesecake, and way too much food around for 20 people. I ate a lot of it. I have this thing about things tasting too yummy…

I’m trying to get back on track today, but I’m struggling. Someone left me alone in an office with delicious cookies sitting two feet away from me. Once you’re out of the wagon, you’re out… but I’m trying to climb back in! HELP!

That’s it… Tonight, I’m re-reading all of my WW booklets. I need a big boost back into my healthy lifestyle. And a run too =)

How did your weekend go?